Ok. I have a little time now to write. That race yesterday was pretty cool. I was not sure what to expect due to the fact that I don't remember even watching a live race. I have been wanting to do a race quite badly since I started jogging a few months back and this was the weekend to do it. I would have prefered to start with something a little less intimidating but all that was available in close proximity to Rockford was the last race in a series of trail runs at Rock Cut and it was a 20k. I figured I would treat it like I had planned on treating my first race, a race against myself. I knew this would be a true test of my will to keep going, due to the fact I have only run more than 5 miles a total of times in my life. This is 12.4 miles on a muddy icy trail, but at least there is scenery along the way.

Pre-race:
I end up circling the park a bit, trying to find where the start of the race is and eventually I do find it. I got registered and my number, etc 30 minutes to the start of the race. Starting to get a nervous stomach and pee for the 10th time in the past 2 hours. I am looking around at all of the people running this and they all look to be in rediculous shape. The guy that parked next to me in the lot looks like he could run an Ultramarathon without a problem. I reassure myself that I can finish. I go back to my car to grab my waist pack and fill my water bottle with Gatoraide. Apply a bit of Aquaphor knowing that even though it is not a long race it might turn into one for me. I am sure most runners know what Aquaphor is but for everyone else, its for chaffing. I didn't think about bringing bandaids which I am regretting today(chaffing of the nips).

So with 5 minutes to the race start I head back to the registration area where the starting line is located. I meet a guy from Naperville who ran this race last year and was telling me about getting passed by old people while in the back of my mind I know I will be there in an hour or so. His name is Derik, he is in the National Guard. The thing I remember the most about him is the huge safety glasses he was wearing. I thought "how wierd", but not 2 minutes into the race I understood why he was wearing them. Can you say flying branches? While the pack of racers had not thinned out yet there were people crowding the trail, the people on the outside pushing branches out of the way and trying to dodge the ones from the people in front of them(me being one of those people). I told Derik that this was my first race ever and he said half laughing, "your kidding right, not even a 5k?" I knew I was going to be in for the pain from that moment on. What added salt to the wound was the next part of our conversation, about the hydration situation along the race. "Not much" was his answer. I thought: "note to self, buy a camelback"

Miles 1 - 4:
It seems that not only did Derik and I forget that the race was starting in a matter of seconds, as did the race official. The race started with everyone yelling "go... go... go..." and we were off. I kept up with Derik and the other guy we were talking to for perhaps an 1/8th of a mile before I forced myself to slow down a bit. I didn't want to burn myself out(it ended up not mattering later anyway). So miles 1 through 3 involved a lot of running on unfamiliar mountain bike trails, and an occasional word with those running by me. Occasionally a younger woman would run by and I would do my best to speed up to stay with her pace like I was some sort of wild animal that had something to prove. I guess running just brings out the beast in me. Either way, it kept one's mind off the run for 20 to 30 minutes. At mile 4 we crossed the main roads that goes into the park from IL-173. On the other side of the road a 5 gallon cooler is sitting on a picnic table with cups strewin all around it. When I got to the cooler it was empty! Well....I got about a 1/2 of a cupful of water. I felt like drinking 20 cups of water though. I continued through the area we were entering which happened to be an area that I had never been through. It was a prairie restoration area. I came upon the end of the field and the path went into a number of pine trees for around a 100 yards. The miles were just not going as fast as I thought they would. It felt like I was running 1 hour miles!

5-8

I came out of the woods onto another area that I did not recognise. It was another prairie in which I could see people around a 1/4 mile ahead running along the parimeter of the forest. This is the point where every 10 minutes I would get really bogged down mentally. I forced myself to smile and look around a bit and comment how beautiful it was out and how lucky I was to be doing this. The good feelings stayed for a little while, then I would get bogged down again. And I would repeat the process. We kind of turned back into the woods and I noticed that I had not seen any of the trail markers(pink pie plates attached to wooden stakes with arrows on them) in the past 10 minutes. I hear a "HELLO?!?" ahead. A woman that looked to be in her mid 30's was standing on the trail and seemed to notice that there was a lack of pie plates as well. I figured we should keep going either way. A few others caught up to us(at least I heard them). We came around a bend in the trail and there was a nice 3' muddy hill to get up. I was coming up behind the same woman that thought we were lost and I was going to help her but she looked like an independant woman and she did it herself before I could even offer to help. I came up on mile 7 and I had been out of Gatoraide for the past 2 miles. I wasn't particularly thirsty(which I knew was a bad sign), and the signs of dehydration started immediately after I thought of water. My inner quads were starting to cramp a bit and I knew it would soon get worse. I remember the horror of a trip to Colorado and getting cramps in my legs so bad that I collapsed on the trail 100 yards from camp and couldn't move for 30 minutes. I figured I should keep moving because either I want to get as close to a road as possible or maybe I can run the cramps out. I grabbed a granola bar from my pack and tried to eat it dry mouthed while running. I don't know how people like Dean K. can do things like eat pizza and drink coffee while running.

8-12.4

The granola bar boosted my energy at mile 8, but I was having to stop every 10 minutes to massage out the cramps in my legs and calves. I was back in the woods running and a woman in her mid-40's was running towards me on the old logging road that the trail was crossing. She stated that she was using the bathroom. She was telling me about the club that put the race on The Rockford Road Runners and how they are a crazy bunch of people. I told her that I would definately fit in then. We had a little more small talk for about a 1/2 a mile, but I knew that I was slowing her down and she eventually did get past me. I felt like I was in a dream with lots and lots of pain. An older fellow came up behind me. He had an British accent. He stated that he got lost and had actually ran an extra 1.5 miles. I had to stop and walk because of cramps again and they were actually getting worse each time I stopped running it hurt worse so I was down to a hobble. I ended up passing the British guy 10 minutes later(the only person I actually passed in the whole race). I was in familiar area now. Very hilly and very fun on a MTB, not so much on foot. I came around a corner to a very steep hill with a thick climbing rope attached to a tree at the top. With 1 mile left I knew that even if I had to walk I would make it across that finish line. With 500 yards left in the race the guy parked next to me in the lot came up behind me and asked if I wanted to do it again. I remarked "yeah, lets take another lap" the last leg was up a hill and I sprinted to beat the guy whom I thought was one of those crazy people that could run the whole course in less than 2 hours. I did end up beating him as well as quite a few others. Final time 2:59:30. Not good, but at least it is not a DNF.

Post race:

A bit of chili and a little stretching and I head back to the truch to guzzle down 2 litters of Gatoraide. In the end would I do it again? Oh yes....

I ran my first race today. It was the last race in the Rock Cut Trail series. I didn't know what to expect or if I could even finish the race. It was a 20k trail race. I knew it would be tough, as I had not run that far before in my life. It truly would be a test of will to finish. I didn't expect the trails to be as muddy as they were. Logan, Kurt, and I had just been mountain biking out there on Tuesday and it was mostly snow and ice which equalled not fun with street slicks on the bike. By the way I bent the frame on my bike that day(somehow) and will have to purchase a new one soon.

I would love to go into detail about the race, maybe at a later time though. I am just too exhausted to talk about it. Plus, I should get back to work.

Tony Delpra had a good word today at the POP meeting.

Cast your bread upon the waters,
for after many days you will find it again.
2 Give portions to seven, yes to eight,
for you do not know what disaster may come upon the land.
3 If clouds are full of water,
they pour rain upon the earth.
Whether a tree falls to the south or to the north,
in the place where it falls, there will it lie.
4 Whoever watches the wind will not plant;
whoever looks at the clouds will not reap.
5 As you do not know the path of the wind,
or how the body is formed [a] in a mother's womb,
so you cannot understand the work of God,
the Maker of all things.
6 Sow your seed in the morning,
and at evening let not your hands be idle,
for you do not know which will succeed,
whether this or that,
or whether both will do equally well.

-Ecclesiastes 11: 1-6

This really spoke to me today. I went confession yesterday and one of the big issues that I have found is dealing with an individual that seems extremely distraught over the recent problems with the Catholic Church and the War in Iraq, and every other thing that is going on in the world. I want to defend the Church but do not want to go about it in the wrong way. I have found myself mostly listening to what the person has to say and trying to understand where he is coming from. It is hard to have conversations with him because he is so negative about everything, which can in a sense transfer to me in which I start to get negative.

Where the scripture comes in is great. "Whether a tree falls to the south or to the north, in the place where it falls, there will it lie." Awesome. What great imagery. It means don't worry about the things you cannot control, or your moment to be what you were created for may pass you by. Letting things that you can't control or do anything about pulls you away from reality in the here and now. The war in Iraq, Church scandals, world hunger, etc... You can't do a damn thing about them besides keep your own life right by praying and doing good when the opportunity knocks (or even looking for opportunities). If you waste your time being consumed by all of the tragedies and unfairness all you are doing is adding to it by not doing your own part, which makes you just as bad.

One mistake by and individual or even years worth of going down the wrong path then eventually finding your way back to God and seeking forgiveness is infinately better than a whole life spent upset and doing nothing but complain about how bad things are in the world.

I just finished a book that is now one of my favorites. The title of the book is "Ultramarathon Man: Confessions of an all-night runner" by Dean Karnazes. The book is an autobiography of this guy who runs ultramarathons (100 mile marathons). Throughout much of the book I found parallels of why he runs. He does runs these remarkable distances and one of the reasons is because he wants to see if he can. He doesn't do these things to compete with other people, it is a competition against his own mind and body. I see many of the things I do much like this. I keep piling up more and more work, school, and stress to see how far I can push it.

Another part of my life that has been missing is adventure. I think that is another huge motivator that has kept me running. Just getting out of the house and running around town a little bit keeps life interesting. It gives me time to clear my head and many times think about everything. I even pray at times(not just that I get to the top of the next hill).

On another note, I had started to run again to get back into shape, bring some adventure into my life, and challenge myself. This book was a good motivator to make me keep up with it.